Princess Pissy Pants The Greedy Cheese Eating Bitch written and performed by Joanne Brookfield. Canberra Theatre Courtyard Studio, September 6.
Joanne Brookfield has made her name since the 2005 Melbourne Comedy Festival telling the story of the 12-year life of her Alsation, Murphy, around Australia and New Zealand. This is not a stand-up comedy act of one-liners, but a cleverly constructed, very funny story as much about being a strong, independent woman as it is about her dog.
We can imagine life from Murphy’s point of view.
“Arf! Arf! Arf! This is me, Murphy, bounding up the hallway to the front door, because I can hear Joanne’s key turning in the lock. She thinks I’m doing this out of doggie loyalty and unconditional love, but I just want to see if there’s a chance I can charge outside, do a big poo right in the middle of the footpath that will really embarrass her because of the rule about picking up my poos. As she said, she wouldn’t pick up yours, not even her own. She comes from Frankston, which she thought was a bit like Gungahlin in Canberra, but in the end the poo-poohing by all those women who think they are ladies who come from Mt Eliza (which has to be said the Queen-like way they say it) where she takes me for walks because she would rather I mess up Mt Eliza than her street in Frankston, got to her and she started taking a plastic bag. Then she could walk with me on the lead and my poo in the bag, and make a kind of statement about the nature of society.”
Murphy once ate a whole cheese, hence that part of the show’s title, but might have gone on to say “I don’t think Princess Pissy Pants was really fair. After all I was really old, had arthritis, could hardly walk or control my bodily functions. And I didn’t know Joanne thought it was great to tell me to ‘Stay’ after I was dead, because that was the only time I did what I was told. You should have seen her telling all those people about it at the theatre, except I was dead by then.”
And indeed, you should have. A full house laughed, groaned and squirmed at Brookfield’s story, brought along photos of their own pets, and supported the charity, ARF, which stands for ACT Rescue & Foster, who rescue healthy abandoned dogs from euthanasia. Look up www.fosterdogs.org if you would like one.
©Frank McKone, Canberra
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